YOU STINK at networking

Networking is my least favorite word in the business language.

It’s one of those action words - like driving - that most people think they’re doing right but you know they stink at it.

Truth 💣️ : YOU stink at it too!

Here’s the problem: When you meet somebody new, especially at a “networking event,” you go into hunter mode. #Fail

I’ll show you a better way.

The Misconception: Networking is a Hunting Game

You hate "networking" as much as I do but you didn’t know why until now.

You scan the room constantly, looking for the person who will be your next client, the big boss who will give you your next break, or even the best-looking guy/girl at the party.

“Who is the next best person I could be talking to, and what is this lady even saying in my ear right now?”

And soon you begin to realize that, everything in the room, even the air itself feels fake.

Because everyone in there is doing the exact same thing.

Networking in its truest form is of the highest importance and absolutely crucial to any form of success in business and life.

So how did I flip the script on this (not to mention my tendency towards introversion) and begin to actually WORK the networking events?

I thought way way way back to my dating days and what brought me my greatest success.

I would NEVER, EVER talk directly to the girl I wanted to ask out but I always ended up with her number eventually. Why? How?

I would build my reputation by finding a way to get in great with her friends.

🔑 Because networking is not about hunting, it is about gathering allies.

The Ally Mindset

Instead of trying to close every person you meet, aim to connect people and bring value to them. Here's how:

Imagine if you met a person and just let them do their version of “networking” which is to talk about how great they are.

Now ask key questions:

• Why are you here?

• What problems are you having?

• What are you missing from your life right now?

Now work yourself around the room and do this with 4, 5, 15 people.

You’ve essentially positioned yourself as the central processor of the network.

So you walk over to Dr. Anderson who loves to host social events and introduce her to Paul, the concierge at the local hotel.

Next, find Jeff the pro golfer and walk him over to Annie the physical therapist who specializes in shoulder stability.

What happens now?

If you couldn’t tell by now, you’ve just become the GO-TO person in the room.

Everybody in there is better off for having met you.

And if you have time, squeeze in your personal mission and make it clear you're open to a deeper, mutually beneficial relationship.

But of course they want that - you’re their new Ally.

Why This Shift Matters

• Builds Trust: Allies are more likely to refer you because they trust you.

• Long-term Gains: Allies can become clients, partners, or mentors down the line.

• Positive Reputation: You become someone people want to meet and want to help.

Networking is not a transaction it's the beginning of a relationship.

So, let's stop selling and start connecting.

Your future allies are waiting.

Brian “read the PS below” Orrr